🚧 Another Craig Johnson Mystery — What The Heck Are These Obscure Utensils?

New York Times best-selling mystery author Craig Johnson has a new mystery for his fans to solve — but it’s not a whodunnit this time.

Instead, the Ucross, Wyoming, author has been posting photos of strange silverware and utensils from his wife Judy’s collection on his Facebook page to see if anyone knows what the oddball utensils are for.

The utensils come from a collection that was owned by his mother-in-law, who recently died. That has the author helping his wife clear out cupboards and sideboards.

“I’m just basically curious,” Johnson told Cowboy State Daily. “Trying to figure out, what the heck is this? How does it work, and all that.”

Johnson said his mother-in-law entertained frequently, which he is sure led to the collection of unique silverware, much of it stored in an old sideboard.

“It’s just gigantic. The amount of stuff that’s in (the sideboard) is awe-inspiring,” Johnson said. “I couldn’t recognize half of it to save my life. I have no idea what these utensils did, or how you’re supposed to use them.”

Some look like medieval torture devices, like one item that had a screw on it, about right for a thumb. That turned out to be for crushing nuts, however. Not thumbs.

“The problem is, it’s not very big,” Johnson said. “So, it’s evidently a nutcracker specifically for small nuts.”

On "Utensil Tuesdays," author Craig Johnson shares photos of obscure utensil's from his mother-in-law's collection, asking what the heck they are. Most of the time, his Facebook followers come through. Above is a julep sipper, a hollow straw underneath with a small ball on the end to muddle the mint. Right is an old cheese slicer. (Courtesy Judy and Craig Johnson)
On "Utensil Tuesdays," author Craig Johnson shares photos of obscure utensil's from his mother-in-law's collection, asking what the heck they are. Most of the time, his Facebook followers come through. Left, the consensus seems to be a nut cracker (not a birth control device as one suggested). Right is a food pusher, which many said was usually used by children to push food onto their other utensils. (Courtesy Judy and Craig Johnson)
On "Utensil Tuesdays," author Craig Johnson shares photos of obscure utensil's from his mother-in-law's collection, asking what the heck they are. Most of the time, his Facebook followers come through. These were a little harder to ID. At left, the consensus seems to be it's a lemon fork. At right, some say is a meat fork, but others say it's a sardine server, which had more support. (Courtesy Judy and Craig Johnson)

Help From The Hive Mind

Johnson is posting a new mystery utensil from the batch each Tuesday on his Facebook page. So far there’s been a squatty fork with five tines, another fork manufactured with tines intentionally splayed out like three fingers, along with a fancy-shmancy silver blade that looks like a carpentry tool, and then the tiny nuts nutcracker.

Johnson said he has at least a couple dozen more strange utensils to post. That means the sleuthing fun won’t be over any time soon for fans.

Johnson has particularly appreciated his fans’ creative and clever responses on the utensil posts.

A post on the apparent carpentry tool, for example, had one fan calling it a “flatware door jammer,” while another suggested it probably belongs to Hector, a character in Johnson’s Longmire series, murdered during Season 3 of the television series.

“Don’t they use that in casinos to clear the chips off the table?” one poster asked, while another said it looked like their chicken poop scoop.

Eventually, though, a preponderance of “food pusher” and “pea pusher” posts made it clear that this utensil was probably an aid for children, to push food up onto their fork or spoon.

Posts on the fork with the splayed-out tines, meanwhile, attracted things like “Drunk fork. Give it to your friend when you want to convince them they’ve had enough to drink.”

One suggested it was a fork children had used to play with in a sandbox. Then, ever so responsibly, they had replaced it back in the drawer from which it came.

“The fork in the road fork!” one post claimed, while another suggested it’s the kind of fork he would use to fend people off when he’s eating, holding it in one hand to stab at would-be food thieves.

Eventually, several posters said the strange implement is probably a lemon fork — or possibly an olive fork. The two apparently look similar.

“That’s just one of the things that the Internet is very, very good at it,” Johnson said. “If you find something strange and you have no idea what it is, there’s this massive ‘hive mind’ out there that I can sic on this problem and see what they can come up with.”

Wyoming New York Times best-selling author Craig Johnson has another mystery — what the heck are these obscure and weird-looking utensils in his mother-in-law’s collection? He shares one a week on Facebook and asks followers to ID them. (Courtesy Judy and Craig Johnson)

Of Murders And Mint Julep

Johnson’s latest find is a mint julep or cocktail spoon, which doubles as a drink straw.

The spoon has a strange shape, which prompted one Facebook fan to suggest it’s simply the spoon you use when all the others are dirty. That gave Johnson a kick.

“I’m like yeah, exactly right,” he said laughing.

But the strange utensils parade on Facebook has also been a fun learning experience, Johnson added.

“Evidently, in the world of utensils, there is like a much vaster array than I ever thought possible,” he said. “And it’s been kind of fun to get to see what people’s responses are, and what these things are.”

The fact such items aren’t really made any more, Johnson said, mirrors not only how the times have changed, but how people have changed in their use of time.

“They did a study of vocabularies at the turn of the century,” Johnson said. “And I think the average American knew something like 3,000 words. And now, evidently, it’s like a 10th of that. Before all the computers and televisions and phones and all that stuff, people had more time to work through their daily life.”

Johnson hasn’t tried any of the utensils out so far, though he said at some point he might.

The julep spoon might be a particularly fun one to try, with its strangely shaped spoon that’s intended to crush or “muddle” herbs and mix up the drink. No need to remove the spoon to drink the cocktail, since it’s also the straw.

As for whether any of the utensils will show up in a future Longmire novel, Johnson was noncommittal.

“Oh, you never can tell,” he said. “But someone who knows how to use one of these things, well, they had a certain upbringing, now, didn’t they? So, we’ll see what happens.”

Contact Renee Jean at renee@cowboystatedaily.com