Rod Miller

Rod Miller: Do Artificial Brains Wear Artificial Stetsons?

Columnist Rod Miller writes, "It was an instructive and interesting exercise to 'work' with artificial intelligence to crank out a column. You saw the result. It was hyperbolic, exaggerated and full of cowboy vernacular. Campfire gossip on steroids."

Rod Miller Told An AI Bot To Write His Column; It Came Up With This

Rod Miller's mind-bending experiment of the week was to tell an artificial intelligence bot to study his past columns, then write one for him. This cowboy concoction was its answer.

Rod Miller: Another Nuclear Boom in Wyoming

Columnist Rod Miller writes, "Wyoming might be on the cusp of a new energy revolution that will see radioactive minerals and rare earths supplant hydrocarbons as the targets of choice for our shovels and drill rigs. We, in Wyoming, have perfected the art of dragging ourselves kicking and screaming from one change to another."

Rod Miller: Ebb Tide For The Wyoming Freedom Caucus

Columnist Rod Miller writes, "This election is where Real Wyoming stands up to the carpetbagging, out-of-state, gnarly orthodoxy of cowboy-cosplaying Freedom Caucus interlopers and affirms its roots. This election is where we prove that our colors are Brown & Gold."

Rod Miller: In Praise of Flawed Horses

Columnist Rod Miller writes, "The poor guy had two strikes against him from the git-go. But he had something intangible that convinced me not to ship him. I can’t describe what that something was. Midnight turned out to be one of the best horses I ever rode."

Rod Miller: “Honor Wyoming” Dishonors Everything About Wyoming

Columnist Rod Miller writes, "These Honor Wyoming videos weren’t produced in Wyoming by Wyomingites, and their message is more Hollywood than Hot Springs County. And the folks behind this snake oil show won’t stand up on their hind legs and claim responsibility for their work."

Rod Miller: Fake Electric Cows – A Cautionary Campfire Tale

Columnist Rod Miller writes, "Stetsons were tipped back as heads were craned toward the black sky, eyes following a pin-prick of light that moved slowly among the stars. 'Is that it?' asked Rimrock, 'Is that Biden’s cow-trackin’ satellite?'"

Rod Miller: Tally Book

Columnist Rod Miller writes, "My granddad Kirk kept a small spiral notebook in the pocket of the wool shirt that he wore regardless of the weather. My own tally book was a tad fancier. It was a Daytimer with a leather cover..."

Rod Miller: NIMBY Version 4.0 – or – The 21st Century Invades Wyoming Along I-80

Columnist Rod Miller writes, "The major projects in Kemmerer and Cheyenne will bring trainloads of money into Wyoming. But too many Wyomingites are too afraid of change and they’ll resist them because 'that’s not how grandpa did things.'"

Rod Miller: A Political Focus Group Around the Ol’ Campfire

Columnist Rod Miller writes, "With the race for Wyoming governor a mere two short years away, dusty drovers sat around the ol’ campfire and pondered their roles as political pundits. 'Hey, I know,' said Sourdough, 'Lets form a focus group an’ help that li’l Secretary of State feller get elected.'"

Rod Miller: How I Acquired My Nonpareil Vocabulary

Columnist Rod Miller writes, "I grew up around some pretty salty, down-to-earth cowboys out there in the Big Empty. My rustic tutors would whisper, 'Rod, go ask your Mom what %@$&#@ means.' I did this so often, you might conclude that I loved the taste of Lava soap."

Rod Miller: Experimenting With Political DNA In The Big Empty

Columnist Rod Miller writes, "The Wyoming Freedom Caucus, or Genetically Modified Republicans (GMRs), as I call ‘em, are the tragic result of a failed experiment in the laboratory of politics."

Rod Miller: Mavericks & Illicit Sex Around The Ol’ Campfire

Columnist Rod Miller writes, "Yeah, they got it written in their bylaws or some such. If a cow strays from the herd, it means that their heart’s not in it an’ they lose the right to be called a cow.”

Rod Miller: Fun With the Wyoming Public Records Act

Columnist Rod Miller writes, "If a city attorney - authorized and paid by the citizens - can keep secret from those citizens their legal advice to a city in Wyoming – a city authorized and funded by the citizens - that secrecy violates the very first principle of government that our Constitution laid out."

Rod Miller: Enough Already – Or – The Final Liberation Of Wyoming’s Political Parties

Columnist Rod Miller writes, "The Weston County contingent is proposing amendments to the Wyoming GOP bylaws that would complete the party’s transition from the legacy Republican Big Tent to a tiny blanket fort with room enough for only diehard fire-breathers who know the password and wear the secret decoding ring."

Rod Miller: Big Iron, Little Hips & Gunplay Around The Ol’ Campfire

Columnist Rod Miller writes, "'Where the hell is my big cookin’ pot?' Cookie brandished a butcherknife at the hands gathered around the ol’ campfire. Latigo Lou from Lingle answered, 'That li’l Secretary of State feller, the one that wants to be governor, he took it down to the creek for target practice.'”

Rod Miller: A Broncpeeler in Drag

Columnist Rod Miller writes, "I have dressed up as a woman exactly twice in my life. And I didn’t do it to be sexually attractive to anyone, and I didn’t dress in drag to make any sort of a political statement."

Rod Miller: Bride Of Chucky – Or – Advice To The Lovelorn From The Ol’ Campfire

From the campfire, columnist Rod Miller writes, "That li’l feller who was here the other night, our Secretary of State, is he really runnin’ for governor?” Joe the Wrangler said, “Yep, but it’ll be a tough go for him. He’s single. Ain’t got no wife.”

Rod Miller: An Easy Win for the Wyoming Freedom Caucus

Columnist Rod Miller writes, "Joe Ricketts intends to build a chi-chi destination resort for other zillionaires in a pristine corner of Wyoming, and -- get this -- he wants to change the name of Bondurant to 'Little Jackson Hole.' I kid you not!"

Rod Miller:  “We the People” And Our Marching Orders

Columnist Rod Miller writes, "It rubs me the wrong way when some folks take a phrase from our Constitution and use it out of context for their own political gain. That displays a cynical lack of understanding and respect."

Rod Miller: Keep It Real, Wyoming

Columnist Rod Miller writes "Logan Gilbert pitches for the Seattle Mariners and doesn’t believe that Wyoming is real. There’s also a Reddit group that disbelieves Wyoming as well, and there are over a thousand members."

Rod Miller: Flip-Flops Around The Ol’ Campfire

Columnist Rod Miller writes: “'They’ll mine this gravel over my dead body!!' squealed the Secretary. 'They’ll pry that gravel from my cold dead hands!' The Kid stood and asked, 'If you don’t want it mined, why the hell did you lease it in the first place?'"

Rod Miller: Ban Human Ignorance, Not the Free Press

Columnist Rod Miller writes, "If politicians are worried about surveillance of the American public, they need to repeal the Patriot Act. I’m less worried about Facebook spying on me than I am about my own government doing the same damn thing."

Rod Miller: The Invasion, Redux

Columnist Rod Miller writes, "My message to the Wyoming Freedom Caucus is, if you can’t find good homegrown candidates and you need to import out-of-state ringers to run for the offices you covet, Wyoming sees you. Weakness like that is hard to hide."

Rod Miller: Saving Daylight Around the Ol’ Campfire

Columnist Rod Miller writes, "Dawn was still just a milky rumor in the eastern sky when Cookie started the campfire. Drowsy cowboys snored in their bedrolls, sounding like a chainsaw fight."

Rod Miller: Should Government Really Operate More Like A Business?

Columnist Rod Miller writes, "How many times have you heard someone say in frustration, government should operate more like a business. That’s like saying that if a saw isn’t cutting the way you want, use a hammer."

Rod Miller: Wyoming’s Freedom Caucus Grinches

Columnist Rod Miller writes, "The Wyoming Freedom Caucus should be called the Big Empty Coalition of the Easily Upset, and their flag should display a string of tightly clutched pearls. Their grumpiness is what will limit them as a political force."

Cat Urbigkit & Rod Miller: The Lookout At The Halfway Mark Of The Legislative Session

Columnists Cat Urbigkit and Rod Miller discuss the Wyoming budget session as they see it shortly after the halfway mark. Both agree there are too many non-budget bills introduced and too many peacocking gubernatorial hopefuls.

Rod Miller: Remembering Pat O’Toole, Wyoming Visionary

Columnist Rod Miller writes, "My old friend Pat O’Toole has ridden on up ahead of the herd to scout a new countryside for water and good grass. You can bet your bottom dollar that, when we catch up with him, he will have picked out the perfect spot to rest."

Rod Miller: Will the Real “Establishment” Please Stand Up?

Columnist Rod Miller writes, "Does hot water come out of your sink faucet when you turn the handle? Yep, you guessed it...'The Establishment' again, the ones who built the infrastructure to bring to your home the blessing of indoor plumbing. The Freedom Caucus had absolutely nothing to do with that miracle."

Rod Miller: Rep. John Bear Puts His Foot In His Mouth

Columnist Rod Miller writes, "I hope the citizens in the small communities east of Gillette are as pissed off as I am. To tolerate John Bear as their representative is just like tolerating Dr. Kevorkian as the family doctor."

Rod Miller: Stampede!! - Or - A Runaway Convention In The Big Empty

Columnist Rod Miller writes, "Because of the muscle-flexing of GOP chair Oral Eathorne and the Wyoming Freedom Caucus, the Wamsutter Convention Center and Monster Truck Arena has been designated as the venue for the Convention of States."

Rod Miller: Walt Gasson’s “Craven Creek” – Dispatches From The Beating Heart Of The Big Empty

Columnist Rod Miller writes, "The cottonwood is the official state tree of Wyoming. In his collection of essays, 'Craven Creek,' Wyoming author Walt Gasson makes a strong argument that it is, in reality, the Family Tree that shades us and roots us deep in the thin Wyoming soil."

Rod Miller: Taylor Swift And Trump Around The Ol’ Campfire

Columnist Rod Miller writes, "Right after Jewish space lasers, devil-worshipping pizza pedophiles, Cuban mind-control particle beams, zombifying pharmaceuticals and hidden Sumerian messages in dirty books, who comes down the pike? Taylor Swift, sent by George Soros and Bill Gates. Wake up, people!”

Rod Miller: Zombie Werewolf Commie Voter Fraud And Chuck Gray To The Rescue!

Columnist Rod Miller writes, "As a champion of limited government and individual freedom, Chuck Gray is proposing a government solution to a problem that really doesn’t exist by imposing restrictions on the individual. That, saddle pals, is the epitome of hypocrisy."

Rod Miller: Border Wars and Politics – A Modest Proposal

Columnist Rod Miller writes, "The border between the U.S. and Mexico leaks like a firehose today and 'border security' is nothing but a myth along that southern line on our map."

Rod Miller: Naked Campfire Politics in The Big Empty

Columnist Rod Miller writes, "Hey, did y’all hear that Rep. Wood Chip is gonna introduce a Genital Intimidation bill? It's a law against intimidatin’ other folks with yer equipment."

Rod Miller: Good Dog Henry’s Only Job

Columnist Rod Miller writes, "Good Dog Henry barks at a lot of stuff that really ain’t there. Vampire zombies, Jewish space-laser intergalactic terrorists, ghost grizzlies, undead proselytizers, juju men and political canvassers from the Other Side..."

Rod Miller: Of Milking Stools and Politics in the Cowboy State

Columnist Rod Miller writes, "While it's early yet, it appears that the centrists are noticing that there are barbarians just outside the gates and are pushing back with their checkbooks."

Rod Miller: In Memoriam -- Bob Johnson, Outlaw Wrestling Coach

Columnist Rod Miller writes, "'Coach' has always been a term of deep respect to me. It means teacher, mentor, trail boss and, in rare instances, friend. Bob Johnson was my wrestling coach at Rawlins High School, and he was all that and more."

Rod Miller: The Sport Of Kings In The Home Of The Horse

Columnist Rod Miller writes, "It is a little known factoid that the horse was born in Wyoming. The earliest fossilized ancestor of the modern horse, Eohippus, was found in the northern Big Horn Basin, at the foot of the Pryor Mountains. Eohippus was a dog-sized critter, hardly the magnificent animal that we know today."

Rod Miller: Baseball, Lightbulbs and Carbon County

Columnist Rod Miller writes, "I hail from Carbon County, one of the five original counties in territorial Wyoming that stretched from Colorado to Montana. And I want to tell you why, when we approach the Pearly Gates, we’ll be met by God driving his dusty ol’ ranch truck with County 6 plates."

Rod Miller: The Thousand Dollar Horse

Columnist Rod Miller writes, "The Marlboro Man showed up at the ranch at the crack of dawn with a horse trailer. While we normally raised our own horses, Darrell Winfield had a proven eye for horses and it was always worth taking a look."

Rod Miller: Football Fever In The Big Empty & The Swamp

Columnist Rod Miller writes, "The Pokes will play in a mid-range but respectable bowl, somewhere between the Rose Bowl and the Dental Floss Bowl. I fully expect our lads to send Coach Bohl into retirement by whupping Toledo like the family mule. Go Pokes!"

Rod Miller: Apologia of a Booksellin’ Cowboy

Columnist Rod Miller writes, "I liquidated my net worth -- state retirement, my stock in the ranch, drained my piggybank and opened Joe Pages Bookstore & Coffeehouse in downtown Cheyenne."

Rod Miller: Barbarians At The Gate Or A New Dawn for Wyoming?

Columnist Rod Miller writes, "If the Wyoming Freedom Caucus, as they themselves predict, actually runs the table during next year’s election, what can we expect? Don’t laugh, it could happen."

Daily Cartoon: Wednesday, November 22, 2023

Rod Miller: Mark Gordon Ain’t No Will Kane

Columnist Rod Miller writes, "Give me a break. Saying you’ll duke it out and then backing down? Any respect I had for Mark Gordon as a political leader vanished with his 'lets get it on' followed by his 'no mas.' Maybe he just wasn’t cut out to be a cowboy."

Rod Miller: The “Cowboy Diaspora” & Deep Wyoming Roots

Columnist Rod Miller writes, "When our young cowgirls and cowboys hanker to stretch their legs and see what lies on the other side of yonder ridge, we should encourage ‘em. We should pack ‘em a lunch and let ‘em know they’ll always have a home to come back to."

Rod Miller:  The Kelly Parcel -- Fertile Ground for Creativity

Columnist Rod Miller writes, "Under an auction, the Kelly Parcel could wind up in the hands of some fatback greedhead developer who would slather the countryside with McMansions, strip malls and roundabouts. Or a Russian oligarch or a Saudi prince could snap it up and do God knows what with it."

Rod Miller: Debate in the Cowboy State? Great!

Columnist Rod Miller says he does his best to help with climate change. "...all those bubbles rising in a frosty glass of Pabst Blue Ribbon are bubbles of that dreaded gas. When I drink it all down, I am sequestering carbon in my body, thus doing my part to save humanity."

Rod Miller: The Media Landscape in Wyoming is Changing

Columnist Rod Miller writes, "If you mount up on a tall horse and survey the media landscape in Wyoming today, you’ll see an unavoidable truth. The venerable old institutions of newsprint journalism are mere shadows of their former selves."

Rod Miller: Schroeder And Inner Circle Broke The Law Besides Looking Like Nincompoops

Columnist Rod Miller writes, "Not only did [the Wyo Dept. of Education's] secrecy look sketchy as hell on its face, their reluctance to divulge information violated the Wyoming Public Records Act. It took an order from a District Court judge to pry the requested records from their sneaky hands."

Rod Miller: The Wyoming Public Records Act At Work

Columnist Rod Miller writes, "It's a disturbing video. Graphic, violent and a man dies in it. But the public has every right to see it. I'm referring to the deputy’s body cam video of a fatal confrontation that Laramie County Sheriff Brian Kozak recently released." 

Rod Miller: Can Wyoming’s Center Prevent An Outbreak Of D.C. Fever?

Columnist Rod Miller writes, "What Matt Gaetz and his fellow House conspirators attacked was not just a sitting speaker of the house, but also the institution itself."

Rod Miller: The Center Must Hold – In Wyoming And The World

Columnist Rod Miller writes, "The siren song of extremism is seductive. It offers a sanctuary where the human mind can take it easy and just go with the flow of some belief system imposed by others. Extremism requires no mental labor, just blind obedience."

Rod Miller: Police Misbehavior And The Critical Role Of The Free Press

Columnist Rod Miller writes, "Cowboy State Daily's Clair McFarland has broken a couple of stories about police misbehavior in Thermopolis. We are watching a real life instance of the power of a free press play out before our eyes in real time."

Rod Miller: Politics Around the Ol’ Wyoming Campfire

Columnist Rod Miller writes, "Chatter around the ol’ campfire devolved into hoots and hollers as each cowboy sang the praises of his own favorite candidate and called everyone else a bunch o’ damn RINOs. The campfire vocabulary was reduced to one and two-syllable words, and finally to grunts, growls and chest thumps."

Rod Miller: How Safe Are Our Persons And Houses In Wyoming? 

Columnist Rod Miller writes, "A cop in Thermopolis broke down a citizen’s door without a warrant of any kind and against the advice of the county attorney's office. A gunfight resulted, with the household resident dying and the cop being wounded." 

Rod Miller: Friday Night Lights in Wyoming’s Lower East Side

Columnist Rod Miller writes, "Confession – I’m a sucker for high school football. My son Vic and I caught the first win of the season for the 2A Burns Broncs in that bucolic little southeastern town out on the edge of America’s amber waves of grain."

Rod Miller: The Empty Head of the Sagebrush Rebellion Raises Itself Again

Columnist Rod Miller writes, "If the Freedom Caucus was too lazy or too proud to get involved in the fed’s planning process on the BLM’s Draft Management Plan from Day One, but then cry crocodile tears when the horse is out of the barn, they aren’t worth listening to."

Rod Miller: Government Secrets vs. The Wyoming Public Records Act

Columnist Rod Miller writes, "In a free society like ours, citizens should know more about government than government knows about us. Knowledge is power, right? When government keeps secrets from its citizens, it becomes a secret government."

Rod Miller: Rep. Lauren Boebert -- You Can Take The Girl Out Of The Trailer Park, But…

Columnist Rod Miller writes, "The Grand Old Party would be well -advised, when choosing their spear-carriers to represent the moral high ground when it comes to sex, to find a handmaiden who can keep her knees together, her hands to herself and her thong in place."