An Idaho man is accused of kicking a bison while drunk, becoming Yellowstone National Park’s first bison attack victim of the season, the park announced Monday.
The incident took stupid human tricks to an entirely new level, the curator of the Yellowstone National Park: Invasion of the Idiots social media site told Cowboy State Daily on Monday.
“You think you’ve heard it all, and then there’s this,” Jen Mignard said. “That is absolutely nutty. What the heck?”
Clarance Yoder, 40, of Idaho Falls, suffered only minor injures in the attack that happened April 21, according to the statement released Monday afternoon by the Yellowstone National Park Public Affairs Office.
Yoder was charged with being under the influence of alcohol to a degree that may endanger oneself, disorderly conduct as to create or maintain a hazardous condition, approaching wildlife and disturbing wildlife.
He appeared in court April 22 and pleaded not guilty to all charges.
Alleged Drunken Bison Kicking
The incident happened near the Seven Mile Bridge on the West Entrance Road, about 7 miles east of the park’s west entrance, according to the National Park Service.
There was a report that a person had harassed a herd of bison, kicking one of them in the leg. Park rangers found the suspect’s vehicle near the West Entrance and stopped it in West Yellowstone, Montana, and arrested Yoder.
“Rangers transported Yoder to a nearby medical facility where he was medically evaluated, treated and released from medical care. He then was transported to the Gallatin County Detention Center,” according to the statement.
The statement did not describe the nature of the bison attack — whether the animal responded by stomping, kicking back or trying to gore its alleged assailant.
The vehicle’s driver, McKenna Bass, 37, of Idaho Falls was also arrested and cited with driving under the influence, interference for failure to yield to emergency light activation, and disturbing wildlife.
She also appeared in court on April 22 and pleaded not guilty to all charges.
Each one of the counts against Yoder and Bass carries a maximum penalty of six months in jail and a $5,000 fine. The incident remains under investigation, according to the Park Service.
‘Even They Have Their Limits’
Despite their massive size and reputation for being cantankerous, bison aren’t unusually aggressive animals, former Montana state veterinarian Martin Zaluski told Cowboy State Daily on Monday.
During his tenure as state veterinarian, Zaluski worked extensively with bison, sometimes in close quarters.
“They’re not actually aggressive animals, but they have their boundaries. And they can be pushed over the edge. They can have a temper, and they can strike out if they’re pushed,” he said.
“That’s not a unique feature of bison,” he added, any wild animal can be aggressive if people don’t respect their space.
“Yellowstone bison are about as tolerant a bison as you can find. They’re used to having a lot of people around. But even they have their limits,” Zaluski said.
The Park Service warns tourists to stay at least 25 yards away from bison; Zaluski said that’s a sound policy.
“Visitors have to have a personal responsibility for their own safety and use common sense around bison,” he said.
Unprecedented
Mignard’s social media site chronicles all sorts of moronic activity, from tourists getting too close to wild critters and thermal features, to that time somebody had the bright idea of trying to drive their car out on the beach at Yellowstone Lake.
But she’s never seen anybody taking to the level of actually kicking a bison.
“No, that’s new. There’s some pretty dumb stuff that goes on, but that was not on the bingo card this year,” she said. “This is Darwin Award material.”
Official Scorecard
For those keeping score, if convicted, Yoder would receive at least 100 points in the "Bison versus Tourists" scorecard available on the Yellowstone: Invasion of the Idiots page.
According to the scorecard, a trip to the hospital, as a result of a bison incident, is worth 100 points.
A simple ground goring is worth one point. But if the goring was preceded by a charge, two points are awarded.
Eight hundred points are presented for flying over a fence due to a head butt.
The real money winners, however, are for de-pantsing: 1,000 points; goring and getting tossed into a tree: 2,000 points; goring, getting tossed into a tree, and de-pantsing: 10 million points.
Mark Heinz can be reached at mark@cowboystatedaily.com.
