For more than two years, Mr. Gnome stoically stood watch over Melissa Desiervo’s garden box in her yard on 9th Street in Laramie, Wyoming.
In true garden gnome fashion, he protected Desiervo's tomatoes, cucumbers, herbs and whatever else she’d plant each season. He was a quiet guardian by day and was busy at night helping to cultivate a prosperous yield.
Seems Mr. Gnome protected everything in the planting box except himself.
“Someone very rudely stole my garden gnome,” Desiervos posted to the Laramie Classifieds Facebook page May 1. “He used to sit right here in front of the ferns and flower cart. People suck. Sigh.”
A photo accompanying the post shows an empty spot on the left where Mr. Gnome used to be, next to a handful of other garden ornaments: a small pushcart wagon, a ceramic frog, a scarecrow, birdhouse and even Mr. Gnome’s little brother “Gnome Jr.,” who sits on a mushroom.
A Morning That Will Live In Infamy
When she noticed Mr. Gnome was gnome more, Desiervo said she was sad, then mad.
“He was just gone,” she told Cowboy State Daily. “I have a little collection of lawn ornaments, and it was just the gnome that was missing. None of the others. That’s how I knew the wind didn’t take it or whatever.”
The 10-inch gnome with his bright red hat, blue coat and habit of leaning on a walking stick is pretty standard as far as garden gnomes go, she said.
And while Mr. Gnome going missing isn’t exactly the Lindbergh kidnapping, that someone would violate her space and steal him is upsetting, Desiervo said.
“I’ve felt his absence,” she said, adding that Hoot, the ceramic owl in a yellow vest that stood next to Mr. Gnome “was pretty sad, but he’s looking forward to his new friend.”
There’s Hope For Humanity After All
That new friend for Hoot is a new garden guardian to take over for Mr. Gnome courtesy of Lydia Mullins of Laramie.
When she saw the post about Mr. Gnome’s disappearance, she bought a new garden gnome and put it in Desiervo’s garden.
“I was so happy about that,” Desiervo said. “Just making this post about a missing gnome is kind of silly, but I was angry.”
When she saw the response, she realized there are a lot of gnome lovers in Laramie who overwhelmed her with support.
“That so many people commented on it and were sharing my pain in losing him was awesome,” she said. “Several people offered to give me a new one. It’s kind of a heartwarming thing. I love that about Laramie.”
While she said she doesn’t wish any real harm on the gnarly person who stole the statuette, Desiervo said she is a believer in karma and that the universe isn’t likely to take it easy on whoever gnomeknapped her friend.
“I can’t imagine what adventures he’s off to now, but I hope he’s not smashed,” Desiervo said.
Now she’s looking forward to painting the new gnome Mullins gave her, and naming it. And she hopes there’s a better future for it and other garden gnomes in Laramie.
And for whoever stole Mr. Gnome, you better hope Desiervo never finds you because she promises to show gnome mercy.
